A promise to [and plea for] paid subscribers.

gratefulness is the root, but necessity is the annoyance.

I honestly wish I did not have to write this. But, here we go.

I go by Minna, but I’ve been known as Kristina for most of my life. I grew up in Augusta, GA. Met a boy. Followed boy to Savannah. Went to SCAD (Savannah College of Art and Design) and obtained a BFA in Performing Arts with a concentration in Dance. Got divorced.

I have danced professionally, choreographed, managed many a production locally and abroad. I have been lucky in opportunity, despite the toll that life put on my body. The stress, the lack of finances, the abundance of noise in a city that you don’t like. A lack of home. So even with my mental health being shat on left and right, I still pulled out some half-ass mess of a good reputation. Now, healthier, I can do a lot more. Settled back in the Savannah area. We got some things straightened out, found out, you get it.

Masking is a bitch. And I have too many things in Capricorn while simultaneously being a Sag. It may be silly, it is still true.

I found out in a few short years that I wasn’t cut out for the “road.” I found myself gravitating to a slower pace and more thoughtful approaches. I have found success here, but, perhaps I’m in need of a bit more. And I’m not afraid to ask for it anymore.

Here’s the thing.

My degree cost money. A LOT of money.

And I don’t have parents, let alone “rich” ones,. lol.

And I don’t have the capacity to “mask” this struggle anymore.

My student loans, that I pay for alone, cost me nearly 1000$ a month and an infinite, non-zero number of stress levels. Navigating the private student loan sector, having to become an “expert” to advocate for myself when necessary and PLEAD with them to understand that I made a decision, yes. I am aware this is my responsibility, yes. But I will not sacrifice myself, literally, no. I did that, I took all of it on when I shouldn’t have. And I am left with that martyrdom feeling more and more like a homicide.

I am a creative person. I can do many things that people don’t want to pay me for. And the things I am paid for, hurt. I’m not willing, any longer, to keep decimating my body, a year at a time. That’s kinda it. So, here’s my plea and promise:

I am pleading with you, lovely, to consider a paid subscription.

Not for me to make a whole bunch of money, but to maybe catch up and catch my breath. I want better for my life, moving forward.

I have spent years pouring into the local Savannah community as a bartender, server, coffee maker and order yeller. I have spent an inordinate amount of time investing in y’all’s lives. Taking care of dogs on weekends. Watching people get to know each other, have kids, get married. Break up. Whatever order I may have met you in, I have deeply cared about how your day has been. But, I can’t keep myself in service industry full time AND do this.

Here, I can express a lot that is helpful. I have never felt more compelled to do more for y’all, than when I’ve been writing for you. I’ve been in OAK, The Savannahian, Instagram rants, holding court at the local craft beer spot about what we could do better. How we can extend space, how we can make more room, everywhere we go.

I am asking to make room here, for me.

Consider paid.

Edit: I believe it goes without saying, but I’d rather be crystal clear. Regardless of how you come to my content and your ability to support it, your attention and time are so incredibly appreciated.